Just a few months ago, I sent Ana upstairs for a shower all by herself, telling her I’d be up in a few minutes after I finished a task.  When I went up to check on her 5 minutes later, she had finished her shower and was standing in the tub in tears, “Mommy, why didn’t you come up.”

I assured her that I knew she would do a good job in the shower by herself because she always had.  “I trust you,” I said.  

“I still need you,” was her reply.

This morning, Ana and I took advantage of the perfect cuddle weather on the couch a few minutes before Ana went up for her shower.  For a fleeting moment, I marveled at how her head still tucks right into my armpit so perfectly.  Soon it won’t, nor will she need or want these cuddle sessions.  I gave Ana an extra squeeze before we headed up for her shower today.

I got her water all ready for her and she stepped into the tub.  “Mom (not Mama or Mommy), you can go on now.  I don’t need you to stay here.  I’m a big girl now.”  I swallowed the few salty-sweet tears that tickled down my throat.  These are the moments we wait for and dread at the same time, for many reasons.  I think all mothers long for their freedom on one had, but wonder just what they’ll do once they have it with the other.  Thank goodness the release doesn’t happen all it once, but in little doses along the way.  I don’t think mother or child could handle it all at once.

I watched a tiny little baby today in the arms of another parishioner.  It’s amazing just how little a newborn is, and how sweet.  I didn’t appreciate mine so much when I had them…I was probably too tired.  Many people told me, “enjoy your baby” and I tried, but probably not hard enough.  So to all of you who have or are about to have wee ones, “enjoy them.”  Before you know it, they won’t need you quite so much.

…looking forward to grandbabies.

God bless!